Sunday, January 25, 2009

um...

um, i spoke way too soon about thinking it was all almost over. yesterday what came out of me was like a horror show and the pain for a few hours was insane.

at 1:30 i started having pretty steady regular cramps. then i had a healing session/massage with a great therapist. i had cramps all through it but handle them okay. then k and i went and had sandwiches and ice cream. i ate it all through some rough cramping. when we got home. around 5:20 i stood up and a gush of blood dropped between my legs. i ran up to the bathroom and passed the first of about nine clots in total. they were large clots like lemons and long fingers. i documented many of them but won't gross you out.

All through the passage of the first six clots, i was in excrutiating pain. i thought my uterus my come sliding out into the toilet.

i called the midwife on call, cause i was bleeding a lot, she told me to get off the toilet because you cannot tell how much blood is really coming out and if i was filling more than a pad an hour i should go to the er. well i filled up a few pads pretty quickly, but they were the thin overnites, so who knows...

i also called my midwife friend and she told me to take the cohoshs (blue one half hour black the next half hour for four hours). i did so and the bleeding seemed to lessen. i let out some more liquid and clots around midnight and then hit the bed. through the nite i did not bleed very much.

and now i am here writing hoping the bleeding stays less throughout the day.
it is the 7 year anniversary of k's mama's passing so she is going to be with her dad and brother and my mama and dad are coming to hang out with me just in case i start to bleed too much.

i have to say all of the bleeding freaked the utter hell out of me. i got panicky and scared and thought i might die. keep in mind i have very light periods--light bleeding for two to three days tops. and passing semi-large pieces of tissue is weird.

here's to hoping it is almost really, really done.

7 comments:

tiff said...

oh my gosh...

just came to check on you and my heart is now aching for you and kk with the unfairness of this all. i am just so so sorry. i can't imagine what you are going through, and don't pretend to.

i am sending you so much love, and hope for healing. xoxo

anofferingoflove said...

my head has been in the sand, i need to apologize for just seeing this now.

i am so, so sorry for your loss. i have been there and it is hell.

you and k are in my thoughts. i am hoping with you that the worst (at least physically) is over.

andrea said...

UGH! stay close to the remedies, and take it easy. you are in my thoughts daily,
andrea

vee said...

Yikes! I'm glad your folks are coming to keep an eye on you. Much love and healing thoughts.

Anonymous said...

Oh, hell.

Love,

Molly

jay said...

Oh I AM sorry. Sending lots of love and healing thoughts to you both. I do hope you're OK. xxxx

Stacey said...

so sorry, we have been reading for a little while now... so so sorry. sending love to both of you at this awful time,x